HELLO INTERNET BOY #48: Paths

Ahead of them, all possibly reachable before the stampede overtook them, were some points of interest. To their right were more groups of trees, a large pile of rocks and boulders somewhere in their midst. To their slight left, there was a series of dips that traveled downward into what seemed a small ravine, where a stream might have once flowed.

Ahead, their path took them through some pockets of clearings, where they’d need to weave in and out of the trees and hope the beasts would be slowed by those same trees in the meantime.

Over in the game, Patrick is trying to get away from the stampede, and has been given some options on how to do it. Tbh, it all looks pretty unappealing as far as ways of not dying goes. I’ve headed towards the rocks – they seem more solid than the ravine. Who knows! Maybe I’ll die.

It’s gotten me thinking about different paths, and different options. As I alluded to in my last post, I’ve got a bunch of shit happening in my life right now. I’ve always been someone who believes in working hard for what you want. When it’s something big and amorphous, like ‘being an author’ it’s easy to stay focused on that. However, it’s the little tributary paths that you have to take while you’re getting to that one big road that can be most confusing. I’ve spent a bit of time recently trying to strong-arm fate, and wrestle destiny into submission, sort of forcing big decision to happen. It’s been really weird (and please note I don’t actually believe in destiny or anything) but all the stuff I’ve been trying to MAKE happen, like changes in career, new opportunities etc – none of them have been working out when I’ve been pushing for them to happen. It’s sort of felt like I know I need to be on a different path, so I’ve been trying to blow holes into the side of the road and make new ones. I think that there’s a place for this, certainly. But it hasn’t been working out. I’ve just been wasting a lot of energy.

Instead, the things I’ve wanted have become apparent with time – like the opportunity to focus more on my writing happened after a complete accident of circumstance. I was certainly looking for that opportunity, but instead of forcing it to happen, the opportunity to take that fork in the road presented itself. Whether or not it will end up being the CORRECT fork in the road remains to be seen. I could still be trampled by lizard-dogs. We could all be trampled by lizard-dogs.

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