Rebecca Black

My friend Geoff Lemon commissioned me to review viral sensation, Rebecca Black. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, here you go. Enjoy.

THE STARS:

Yes, yes, yes. The lyrics are the most deplorable word salad that’s ever been heard this side of a dictionary having an epileptic fit. I know. But I have a theory that will revolutionise the world of pop music. For generations, pop has skated the thin line of banality and catchiness, abominably fitting words into simple melodies.

What Rebecca Black has done is simplify the pop song into a stream of consciousness monologue. It still means absolutely nothing, like the pop songs of old, but reduces the entire process to her simply noticing things around her. In her debut single, she literally wakes up on a Friday and then expresses her basic thoughts as she listlessly ghosts through the day, thinking of the weekend.
As she says, ‘we, we, we so excited’.

Personally, I think this is a bold and welcome change. I like my drivel knowing that it is drivel.

LACK OF STARS:

The Spontaneity Review presents:

TUESDAY: (Official Video)

# 11.45 waking up in the morning, gotta find out where I am, gotta get going I am cold.
Gotta move my legs, remember how to breathe, where are my pants?
It’s Tuesday, Tuesday, gotta find my pants on Tuesday.
Vaguely dreading the weekend, weekend.
Tuesday, Tuesday, ridiculously hungover on Tuesday,
 scared of this strange bearded mannnnn.
Partying, partying. Yeah! Partying, partying. Yeah!
Fun, fun, fun, fun,
Gotta make my mind up, I see my pants!
Tuesday, Tuesday, really hate Tuesday.
Kick my pants down on Tuesday.
We, we, we, so awkward.

THE SCORE: 1/5 stars.

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2 thoughts on “Rebecca Black

  1. Aaahaha! I had no expectation this would be done in such quick time, and then I boot up the internet and there it is. This just so entirely made my day.

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